We've been working with Chloe on using a spoon and fork for months now. She's very interested in the idea of feeding herself but she just can't seem to get the dip-and-scoop motion to work for her. She'll take her spoon and tap it furiously into her food but just can't scoop any food onto it. Months. Every single day I put a spoon into her hand and we work on it. For three meals a day. It's becoming tiresome. But on the bright side, she can put the spoon in her mouth. She gets angry if I try to take the spoon away from her and sometimes she won't let me guide her hand to do the scoop so we sometimes use two spoons (or forks). I'll get the food onto one utensil and hand it to her. As she puts it into her mouth I'll sneak the other utensil from her other hand.
Chloe's Occupational Therapist made these nifty bent spoons and forks. They're supposed to help her get the food into her mouth easier by requiring less of a wrist bend to point it toward her mouth. Getting it into her mouth isn't the problem, though...
The bent spoons can only be used with one hand, and we're not sure whether Chloe is a righty or a lefty, so we have some of each. (Solana's a strong lefty so we're suspicious that Chloe will be, too. Well, I'm suspicious...Dave's pleased.) The bent spoons seem to make feeding time even more difficult and frustrating for Chloe, though, because she likes switching back and forth. They were briefly interesting but didn't help so we've given up on them.
All of this self-feeding business has really put a cramp in Chloe's food consumption. We spend so much time and energy trying to eat that it creates a bit of tension for her and she's acting out a bit. She'll refuse to eat unless certain conditions are met. And with her limited communication skills it takes a bit of work to figure out her conditions. The other day I couldn't figure out what she wanted. Do you want to hold this fork? Do you want to try and scoop? Can I just feed you? How about another spoon? Do you want a drink? She refused all my suggestions and began wailing and flailing at the table. I was at a loss. Then Solana offered to feed Chloe. I resigned to another seat and Solana moved over to the Mommy chair.
Chloe opened wide and happily took a bite. And another. And another. Little sister ate it up...literally.
In the meantime, Solana was taking bites to demonstrate proper eating technique for Chloe and finished her own food in record time.
Big sister asked me if I was jealous. "A little," I admitted. But I was also thrilled.
Today was the third time Solana took over the reigns. She wasn't quite as successful as the first couple of times but still did better than I.
It's nice to have a little helper around. I'm thankful for my Solana. I am hopeful for my Chloe.
5 comments:
This made me cry. I could hear your frustration in your post and know that it can't be easy, especially when they can't tell you what is wrong. And Solana stepping in, and being successful, was heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time. You're doing fine momma. And you're blessed with such a fine helper in Solana.
Sometimes you can teach a skill in one area that will translate into another. If it is possible to set up a small sand box with shovels(even large spoons) and buckets, Chloe can learn and enjoy the scooping motion. That might take some of the stress off mealtime. Hugs to all.
Wow, reading this felt all too familiar. I get it, Cyndi, I get it. And we too have had success with the siblings. It didn't take long before he was refusing it from them too, unfortunately. Oh, the struggle between independence, fussy normal toddlerness, their limitations, and everything else. "Tiresome" is a great word for The Great Eating Battle.
Man, can I borrow Solana? Grant used to get pretty frustrated when he couldn't get the food in his mouth or couldn't stab the food with his hands. I felt really bad for him and one day I bent down next to him and quietly explained to him (while he was upset) that it was ok, just to take his time, and he could use his hands and try again in a little while. I'll never forget that day because he looked at me with tears in his eyes, put down the fork, used his hands (I praised him), and he smiled so big. Then, he tried again with his fork, used it successfully (well, successfully for him) clapped and cheered yea with a huge grin. It's funny to me how patient I am with Grant.
I'm kinda happy you gave up on the weird spoons. Don't know why but I'm not big into using stuff like that.
Man, can I borrow Solana? Grant used to get pretty frustrated when he couldn't get the food in his mouth or couldn't stab the food with his hands. I felt really bad for him and one day I bent down next to him and quietly explained to him (while he was upset) that it was ok, just to take his time, and he could use his hands and try again in a little while. I'll never forget that day because he looked at me with tears in his eyes, put down the fork, used his hands (I praised him), and he smiled so big. Then, he tried again with his fork, used it successfully (well, successfully for him) clapped and cheered yea with a huge grin. It's funny to me how patient I am with Grant.
I'm kinda happy you gave up on the weird spoons. Don't know why but I'm not big into using stuff like that.
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