Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Today at breakfast Chloe started saying, "Bye Leila. Bye Leila. Bye Leila. Bye Leila." Over and over and over and over and over. It was cute and she kept changing the pitch every time she said it. I smiled and she knew she was being cute. She smiled back and kept saying it. First, I thought, "How cool. We don't say Leila's name a lot to her. It's almost as though Leila's sending her thoughts from heaven and they're having a connection."
But the truth is I know she's just playing with sounds and trying out new words. When she pronounced "Chloe" as "Lola" I thought, "Hmm. That's odd." She's been calling me "Lala" lately. That's what the babies call my sister so I've been trying to put a stop to that. But this morning was just too much. My mind went to that place...the sister she should be babbling with...the twin she'll never experience. I hate feeling that way and having those thoughts. I wish I didn't have to.
There's a set of identical twins on Solana's soccer team this year. I've taken to referring to them "the sisters" and it somehow makes me feel better.